Ouran High School Host Club: Follow Your Nose
by KikuTheTurtle
Summary: Ever since Haruhi recovered from a stressful period of Ouran life, she's been giving off this strange odor that reeks of contentment and heavenliness. A snippet of conversation leads to an investigation and a lot of laughs at misconceptions about H things


Ouran High School Host Club: The Smell of Love.

Chapter 1: When You Can't See, Just Smell For It...

Fujioka Haruhi was your normal everyday high school girl attending a rather rich and famous school called Ouran. Ouran Academy is home to the Ouran High School Host Club, a group of handsome and even richer guys, who each had their own unique characteristics and personality. Haruhi was part of this host club but the only problem is that she's a girl, a girl who owes a pretty big debt for breaking a vase that was worth about 800,000 yen, an amount that she could only dream about and to pay her debt she works as a host, disguised as a guy. Fortunately, she would be able to pay off all her debt at the end of the year. On the other hand, she was forced to balance both schoolwork and homework in a fashion that required her to find sleep whenever she could. That included lunch, passing period, and during meals. Of course, balancing such a life puts stress on a person and Haruhi was beginning to show signs of it, fatigue setting in slowly in the form of dark circles under her eyes and a slack jaw that left her looking like she just saw Tamaki go joypeeing.

Back to the topic at hand, the Host Club eventually noticed this and tried to help Haruhi by reducing the time she spent at the Host Club. Of course, Kyouya would make her start coming earlier next week in order to make up for the difference. Haruhi had bounced back magnificently and was now raking in the profits, the peaceful and natural atmosphere she gave off usually having become an ethereal and heavenly atmosphere that everyone feel natural. The soothing feeling of being Haruhi left the other members of the Host Club with few customers as they watched Haruhi entertain over fifty girls with a few words and naturally graceful gestures that one would normally see from royalty at their best.

"Oh, okaa-san!" Tamaki cheerfully cried, "our Haruhi is performing so well as a host!"

'You mean 'my Haruhi', don't you?' Kyouya thought with a smirk that was misinterpreted as consent to Tamaki's comment, "her profit revenue has risen nearly two hundred and seven percent. She's made up the difference in two days time and if she keeps this up, she'll pay the debt off by the end of next year,"

Everyone watched Ootori Kyouya scribble away in his notebook, the Hitachin twins looking over slowly to see what it was. Kyouya snapped the book shut suddenly, scaring the living daylights out of the twins.

"Have you noticed though?" Tamaki asked thoughtfully, "every single time I pass by her, I get the feeling I was in a flower garden,"

"Eh, tono, you noticed too?" the Hitachin asked in amazement.

"Of course, I am her otou-san! How could I not know?! I know everything there is to know about her!" Tamaki yelled in outrage.

"Do you know her birthday?" Hikaru asked.

"No," Tamaki grunted.

"Do you know what color her panties are?" Kaoru asked.

"No," Tamaki squeaked.

"Do you know what her bra size is?" they both asked with a gleam in their eyes.

"NO!" Tamaki wailed as he fled to his dark corner with the white squiggly lines above it and sulked there, a blank look on his face.

"Well, we do!" the twins chuckled in victory, holding out victory signs.

"Oi, Kyouya, how can we make Haruhi stay?" Kaoru asked, "no one really wants her to leave,"

A smirk was the only reply to that.

'She may try but there's nothing to keep me from adding expenses to make her stay,' Kyouya chuckled softly as he walked away.

The day ended softly as Haruhi walked the girls out of the door. After they all left, she shut the door and sighed in relief, wiping off a slight sheen of sweat on her forehead. She straightened out her uniform and walked over to help clean up the room. Quietly, she sidled over to Kyouya, pretending to carry dirty tableclothes towards the laundry baskets.

"My house today?" she whispered, "my father is out tonight,"

"Sure," Kyouya answered as he coughed, "Haruhi, the laundry baskets are in that direction,"

"Ah, hai!" Haruhi stuttered as she swung about suddenly, almost losing her balance.

Kyouya gave her a slight tap that set her straight before sighing and closing the notebook, having finished whatever he was writing. He watched Haruhi scurry around and smirked before leaving the room.

Anyways, the Host Club finished cleaning up and Haruhi said her goodbyes. However, the Hitachin twins had surprised Tamaki and dragged him off to the side, which had attracted Mori's and Honi's attention.

"What do you two want?" Tamaki groused.

"Oi, tono. Listen to us, will you?" Hikaru grumbled.

"We're not horrid devils all the time," Kaoru grunted.

"Well, I don't care about what you have to say," Tamaki declared as he strutted away.

"Even if it was about Haruhi?" the twins chorused.

Tamaki zoomed right back into the little discussion, "Well, well! What is it? Spill it already!"

"Tono, you remember when Haruhi was stressed out right?" Hikaru began.

Tamaki nodded, "Of course I could remember. I was worried all the time for her,"

"Look, we noticed she started smelling of some strange scent, the one you just noticed. She told us it was some aromatherapy and it worked wonders for her," Kaoru added to his twin's conversation, "we also noticed just today that Kyouya smelled of vaguely the same thing,"

"Eh? So they did something together," Tamaki's jaw dropped.

"Look, tono, we don't know. We heard Haruhi whisper to Kyouya about something at her house at the same time. So why don't we go find out about it?" Kaoru suggested.

"Yes, a stakeout!" Tamaki declared.

"Cake! I'll bring cake!" Mitsukuni cheered.

'I don't think this is a good idea,' Mori thought as he followed a cheering Huni-senpai out the door.

* * *

To be honest, the Host Club minus two members noticed Kyouya's limo located outside of Haruhi's apartment complex. They came in all black with black camoflauge paint covering their faces. To be honest, they looked like Mr. Game and Watch as they scurried from the cover of each individual car to another car. Well... that was only Tamaki... The other four simply walked behind him, blank looks of WTF on their face as they followed the ever-enthusiastic Tamaki to failure.

"We have arrived safely!" Tamaki suddenly yelled as he arrived at the apartment complex gates.

"Baka," the twins echoed.

Tamaki went to his corner of gloom again as the Host Club members entered. Upon realizing no one was there, he squeaked as he ran inside as well... They crept up the stairs quietly and stumbled over to Haruhi's apartment. All was quiet for a moment...

"Kyouya... Ooh!" a soft voice drifted to their ears.

"What the hell?" Hikaru muttered as he crept closer to the door and put his ear up against it, all the other host members followed suit.

"Yes... Right there! Right there! That's the spot! Oh!" the spy group suddenly started as they realized who was behind that door.

Soft moans and mews followed as blood rushed up through the Host Club's face, threatening to come out their noses.

"NO!" Tamaki cried, "Kyouya is doing H things to my daughter!"

He tried to ram the door down but Hikaru and Kaoru held him back, hissing at him not to do anything stupid. Mori just stood there and watched while Huni-senpai just ate more cake, enjoying the show.

"Huni-senpai, break down the door!" Tamaki yelled.

"Why?" Huni asked innocently.

"Because... because... there is more cake on the other side!"

"CAKE!" Mitsukuni broke down the door with the strength that the Japanese government had plead with him not to use, breaking down not only the door but pretty much the whole supporting wall of that apartment.

The dust cleared to reveal Haruhi lying on a cot with Kyouya bent over her, his hand on her shoulders.

All was silent for a few moments before Haruhi grabbed a towel from Kyouya, who was dressed in a bathrobe, wrapping the towel around herself as she covered up.

"Alright... Which one of you guys destroyed my apartment?" Haruhi sighed.

Mitsukuni burst into tears and ran into Haruhi's arms, "I'm sorry! Tama-chan told me there was cake here and I couldn't help myself!"

Haruhi glared at Tamaki, who chuckled nervously as Haruhi glared at him steadily from his position near the roof.

"Well, I can't stay here anymore," Haruhi sighed as the roof collapsed around Tamaki, amazingly leaving him unburied, "this place is just totaled,"

"Haru-chan! You can stay at my house!" Huni sniffled, "I'm sorry! I really am! I'll make it up to you!"

"There's nothing to forgive," Haruhi sighed, "don't worry about it,"

"ReallY?" Huni asked hesitantly.

"Really!" Haruhi smiled.

"Good!" Kyouya smirked as he swept Haruhi off her feet, "that means you can stay at my home,"

"WHAT?" Haruhi sputtered, "I can't do that! That's not right,"

"Oh, really? We haven't finished this session though," Kyouya chuckled, "we only got halfway through the massage,"

"No! Wait! Huni-senpai! Help!" Haruhi yelled as she flailed uselessly.

"Huni, if you don't want your cake allowance to be taken away, stand aside," Kyouya snapped, his eyes taking on a sharp predatory gleam unmitigated by his glasses, which were now buried in the rubble somewhere.

Huni stood to the side and whimpered as Haruhi cried for help. The slam of the car door shut off her pleas for help and Haruhi disappeared with Kyouya into the night. The other hosts were left to wonder exactly what in the seven hells had just happened. The smell of flowers suddenly swept over them as Tamaki made a random comment.

"I think I just joypeed..."

* * *

Author's Notes: Eh, WTF??

* * *


End file.
